


there you go again, making me love you

by TheSeerOfTime



Category: Hidden Block (Video Blogging RPF)
Genre: M/M, PAST messy break-ups, lmao enjoy this trash, lowercase on purpose, messy break-ups, mostly from ian's side, sorry james, time for the reguarly scheduled Angst™
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-06-06 00:53:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6731044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSeerOfTime/pseuds/TheSeerOfTime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ian and james were never meant to last.</p>
<p>they knew that at the start.</p>
<p>ian doesn't want to admit that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>[ somewhat inspired by 'one more night' by maroon 5 ]</p>
            </blockquote>





	there you go again, making me love you

**Author's Note:**

> here's some more angst™ for everybody  
> it gets kinda rambly at the end!!!! im sorry!!!

_one more night,_ james promises, forcing the words out like they're poison. he doesn't want to admit he doesn't want to leave, but he thinks it's the best for both of them.

ian tries to protest, trying to keep him there. even if whatever they have is messy and not the best, ian  _needs_ it. it fills the hole in him he likes to pretend doesn't exist, left after his last relationship went south.

(he often wonders if it messed jeff up just as much, even if he was the one to leave.)

the thought of it being _over_  hurts both. but james still swears it's for the best, that ian would be better off without him. he doesn't  _need_ to be there. 

after all, they both knew it wasn't going to last. bounce back relationships never do, after all.

ian just wanted this one to last a little longer. he needed it to last a little longer.

he didn't want to be the one left again.

* * *

he wakes up the next morning to an empty bed, aside from a small note on the other pillows. it feels cold in his room, like it had felt for so long, before james. 

the empty feeling returns. he had almost forgotten what it felt like. 

this is not a friendly reminder, however. this is a sword through his heart.

ian doesn't read the note. he's sure he knows what it says. it'd be an apology, maybe even wishing him well. perhaps even a message of hope, that he doesn't hate james for this, that he understands why it had to end like this.

mark this as the _second_ time ian's relationship ended messily. two times too many.

(although he considers the first time to be much, much worse.)

he doesn't get out of bed that day. he doesn't care enough to.

funny how he kept not caring for a little while.

* * *

eventually ian starts to pretend he's okay. after all, nobody really knew he and james were a thing, so he couldn't mope about it for too long.

he claims he was sick, as to why he didn't do anything for awhile. people accept that excuse, he knew they would.

it's an easy excuse, but hey, it works. 

(mostly. a few people ask if that's what really happened. he doesn't respond.)

soon he finds himself back in the swing of things, for the most part. he still feels empty. but he pushes that to the back burner and acts like he moved on.

that's what he did before, anyway. nobody really noticed. sometimes, though, he wonders if james is okay. maybe he's faking it, too, but how is ian supposed to ask?

"hey, i know we just broke up but here's a really personal question."

it's a stupid, desperate thought. 

he clings to it, though, hoping somewhat selfishly that james hurts as much as he does.

_he deserves it,_ ian reasons with himself. 

_and_ _i don't. not again._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for making it all the way to the end!!! hope you enjoyed the sad
> 
> comments/kudos are appreciated!!


End file.
